Blog from Maribeth Kuzmeski of Red Zone Marketing
Being a great listener is not just about sitting back politely, providing appropriately timed head nods of encouragement, and taking in what another in a conversation is saying. If you can’t engage the person you are in a conversation with, then more often than not, you are not going to have to listen for very long, especially if you are just meeting this person.
By watching some of our connector clients at Red Zone Marketing in action, I’ve observed that being a great listener comes down to getting the other person talking.
How do I do that?
Ask great questions. If you ask quality questions it keeps a conversation rolling, even with someone you have just met, allowing you to learn more valuable information about that person, which, in turn, brings greater value to you for listening.
Asking questions that engage show that you have a sincere curiosity and desire to get to know the other person. If you are just going through the motions of generic question asking, the sincerity is lost, and the answers you receive will most likely be just as generic. If you are going to bother being a listener, why not make sure you have great things to listen to! In the end, you become more memorable because you cared enough to ask and then listen!
To start becoming a great listener, come up with a list of questions to ask of another businessperson that you don’t know. Here are a few that will drive your conversation away from the trite generic answers your conversationalist has stored away to use when meeting new people:
-How did you get into this business?
-What’s something you’ve done that has really changed your career?
-What has your greatest success story been this year?
-What’s your biggest challenge?
-What’s a good client for you?
-Have you read any good books lately?
-Where did you grow up? Do you still have family there?
-Do you have kids? How many, how old, what are they involved in, etc
-Did you hear that… (something from the Wall Street Journal, local newspaper, news website, or Industry publication that day)
These questions not only give you more rewarding information to listen to, they also allow you to discover connections between you and the other person. Connections are what form relationships. Just by listening you can find these connections. Finding out that the two of you grew up a town away from each other, started out working at the same company, or share a similar Ideal Client are all great things to find out.
Being a great listener with great questions allows you to find the connections with others and then use that info to build on that relationship. You will come to find that many great listeners are also great at forming and maintaining key relationships in business.
What are some questions you like to engage people with when first starting up a conversation?
Maribeth Kuzmeski, is the author of the new book, The Connectors: How the World's Most Successful Businesspeople Build Relationships and Win Clients for Life
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